Things I've Learned Or Imagined Or Invented Since She Got Pregnant

1) If you are considering getting pregnant, expect to have frank conversations in yoga studios with fellow parents-to-be about mucous plugs, all while eating strawberries and mixed nuts.  In other words, there are consequences.

2)  I wonder if anyone has ever tried to live in an Ikea showroom, like a pre-fabricated Scandinavian furniture version of From the Mixed-Up Files of Mrs. Basil E. Frankweiler.

3) I'm going to be a pushover as a dad.  I'm totally good-cop material, which means my wife will have to do all the discipline.  I'm okay with that.

4) Baby-clothing spontaneously generates at an exponential rate of return. 

5) Sources now tell me that item # 3 is incorrect and should be quickly retracted. 

6) It can be surprisingly satisfying to get your installed dryer fixed so that it no longer makes a horrible screeching sound.  Knowing that you can do laundry day and night without having to put on pants is a comforting thought, especially when you no longer have to worry that the dryer is in horrible, agonizing pain. 

7) Training a cat not to sleep in the crib or bassinet is a Sisyphean task.  The more you tell her no, the faster she'll sneak back in there the moment she sees a chance.  It's like trying to teach doughnuts not to be delicious.  On the other hand, maybe this is good training for dealing with a daughter who will one day be a teenager. 

That's all for now.  More to come, I'm sure.